[advert:mpu]Why? Baby disco is has come to town. Just when I thought those lovely spandex pedal pushers would never get another outing, I see my opportunity to look both manly and fashionable at the same time. Clever Daddy.
Then the doubts start to creep in... Actually it’s been a while since I was setting dance floors on fire, least of all with a 21 month old causing mayhem with my bend and snap. But hey I can pull this off. What have I got to lose apart from self esteem, six months off work with a fractured pelvis and the everlasting shame of being outdanced by a four-year-old wearing deelyboppers?
But no, I’ve decided to see it through. I am a man, and I shall take a stand for the constitutional right of fathers everywhere to make utter pillocks of themselves
Despite the naysayers and a quick call to my chiropractor that ends in finger-pointing acrimony and quite possibly a lawsuit. I decide to book, because life, as my good friend Johnny Chase told me, is for the adventurous.
I dig out the old vinyl, classic funk and dance gems from years gone by, not for the practise, mind, I definitely don’t need it. The memories of my classy record collection brings a tear to the eye. Roy Ayers, Grace Jones, Joe Dolce. Zoikes, didn’t I have amazin’ taste back in the day.
Practice, practice, practice. Only three months to go until I break out my jaw-dropping robot/disco duck moves in front of a crowd of non-plussed nippers. Will it end in tears? Not if I double stitch my disco pants it won’t.
Dancin’ dontcha just love it?
Next time: the slipped disc is coming on well, now I just need to wait for the knee op.
Yes, it’s time to make the leap to the Big Room at Nursery.
When do you officially draw the line between having a baby and having a toddler?
Roy's money saving tips for Christmas games (please, do not try these at home...).
Things I now know about long haul flights and holidays in Cuba...
I’ve had to take it all back. The gentle ribbing, guffawing and outright pointing, as well as the laughing at other people's summer misfortune....
"My Grandad Jack went to heaven recently. I am a little sad about this....
Now that I am big, I have written an open letter to my Daddy. And a list. I hope he's ready for them....
Well now, it’s been a while since my last post. What with house decorating, tickling baby and watching Heroes (the best thing on telly, after Entourage, of course)
I've been wondering whether babies have the power to alter the fabric of time. Using my new (dubiously un-scientific) theory I calculate I've lost five whole days since August 2006.
I’ve polished my shoes, coiffed my hair (it didn’t take long), dug out the wedding suit. The reason? It’s christening time for newly minted daughter.
The hidden cost of flying low-cost, high stress with a new baby in tow...
Fatherhood sneaks up on you. It punches you square in the mush in the midst of the normal. In the supermarket, at the pub (some chance) YOU MUST BE RESPONSIBLE!
She’s here! Oh the joy! The nine months of patiently waiting; the thumb-twiddling; the trying to appear nonchalant while feeling secretly horrified at the sight of instruments of torture....